Handling Adolescents

There is a lot of fretting and fuming , tension and even frustration in the minds of parents, particularly those belonging to the middle class families, on account of performance of their children in school and college exams in general, and competitive exams in particular . The ever growing competition and rising expectations of parents results in damaging the psyche and personality of the teenagers . Parents generally tend to over-react and do not go by reality, based on proper assessment of their children’s capabilities. Matters become worse when parents find fault with the children alone without devoting adequate attention from the very beginning . The problem is apparently taking serious proportions day by day, necessitating discussion on the subject .

Selection of a school for a child is one of the important factors since school plays a crucial role in shaping the child’s personality, building its character and giving it a direction for the future . School is a place where a child spends at least 14-15 years of his/her life . The school environment involves the child’s contact and interaction with the principal, the class teacher, subject teachers, classmates and friends . Each and every individual influences the child’s mind in one way or the other.

Why does interest in studies flag ?

Many a times, dedicated students show lack of interest
in studies during adolescence . One of the reasons put forth by teachers is that they get distracted because of their gradual exposure to new changes in and around them .

How to sense that your child is losing interest in academic field?

Growing children begin with loss of interest in a particular subject or books in general . some lose interest due to discouraging teachers and lack of motivation at home . Some begin to complain of severe headaches during study hours only . Many children are low achievers and find it too hard to shoulder the burden of senior classes .

In few cases, children are talented in some other fields but are unable to develop their areas of interest and finally land up doing nothing.

Lack of Motivation

Teaching staff and parents are the two main sources of motivation . But both support systems are crumbling down.

“Completing the prescribed syllabus by hook or by crook seems to have become an end in itself unrelated to the philosophical, social psychological aims of education .”

Both teaching and learning have become cumbersome . Teachers always operate under pressure . Their sole aim is to finish the syllabus .

Students on the other hand find learning a boring and unpleasant experience . In fact, they mug up full fledged lessons without understanding much . Teachers do not have enough time and sometimes not even the inclination to make sure whether the student grasps the basics . In no time, students start viewing books as a load they have to shoulder.Examination becomes a fearful experience that leaves them disheartened and broken .

Over Ambitious Parents

Growing children nowadays undergo a lot of tension and internal conflict because their parents are over-ambitions . They want their children to fulfill al their unfulfilled desires and ambition . Parents provide all facilities and do not leave a single stone unturned – from school class rooms to regular coaching classes and even postal study material . The result is that children constantly feel over loaded but still continue to achieve the impossible just because parental pressure mounts up .

Ignoring Talent and Creativity

Every individual is creative or talented in one way or the other . It is not even difficult to find out where one’s interest lies . A child who is inclined towards sketching will definitely be more interested in his drawing assignments rather than in division or multiplication and vice versa .

But if the environment is not conducive then chances are that he may never develop his talents . During adolescence which is the growing into maturity stage, likes and dislikes come to the fore and the teenagers mould themselves in a particular personality type . This is the time when we as parents and teachers can not only help each other to understand them better but also guide these growing children to choose a particular field . One should always encourage the child to excel in a field of its own choice because success in life has a deep rooted link with preferences and interests .


Our education system is qualitatively inadequate . The syllabus is very heavy . Teachers are either not skilled and many a times personal attention becomes impossible as the group sizes are large .

Thus learning becomes frustrating – some students manage to cope up and weaker souls give up or drop out .

The present education system does not make learning possible . There is too much of stress on one – time performance cramming is the only tool that ensures success in exams . Learning and scoring well in exams are two different things .

Some students are very intelligent and do well in class tests but fail to perform equally well in final exams. The reason is simple . The syllabus is more during exams and students generally fail to retain and later on reproduce the prepared lesson . Semester system judges performance in a better way .

In short , the importance of learning should be stressed .

Education system should be reformed, if not changed .

While Helping Your Child Chose His Career

First and foremost thing that should be considered while choosing a child’s career, is the child’s interest . A child should always go in for a field of its own choice. Otherwise ultimately it will have to face frustrations . In our country generally a very few percentage of parents really evaluate their child properly and encourage it to take up the career of his/her ‘ choice . Instead, they take decisions for them .

Being parents does not mean doing all this . Force should not be implemented here, as it will result in utter failure. Often we have seen that people having flourishing business never ever want their son to go in for any other profession than business .

Moreover if the child shows its disliking towards it, the parents do not hesitate even to force him/her . They think the child instead of refusing to go in for it, should feel obliged as it is inheriting a well established business without any struggle on his/her part.

But in such cases the parent’s interpretation is absolutely wrong . If a person is not satisfied with his job, he can never be happy and lead a contented life. Job satisfaction is the most important thing which is looked for by everyone . However, three persons play very important roles in this regard. The class teachers, the parents and, the subject teacher.

The class teacher knows the child better than other teachers because she/he is generally in touch with the child for a longer period. This increases the familiarity between the two. It is the class teacher, who deals with all the problems of a student. Parents also know their child better than anyone else.

They know about their likes and dislikes in details. They should place before the child all the options, provide it with all facilities that it needs and guide it properly. However, the final decision is to be taken by the child . It is the child who after going thought all the good and bad points of all the professions, chooses one of his/her choice.

And then comes the role of the subject teacher which is to guide the child further i.e., suppose a child wants to become an engineer-the subject teacher can tell it at length about the future prospects of all the branches of engineering . He can guide him/her to study for the entrance exams , tell about the institutes that provide the best education and help by providing proper coaching if the student has any doubts regarding the studies.

Some Tips For Parents

  • Don’t compare your child with other children on educational basis.

  • Don’t force any career on him just because you think that it’s right for him. Let him chose his own stream of interest and you can just assist in decision making process.

  • Don’t ignore the talent and creativity of your child and help him to grow that talent to the level of perfection.

  • Give proper encouragement to your child and if you do not  agree  to his decision tell him to take advice from some counselor or tell him gently your point of views.

  • Don’t be over ambitious. All children are not alike. Help your child not to feel left out if he’s not talented in some field.

  • Remember that every child has some talent and you have to bring out that hidden talent in him.

  • Help your child chose proper career according to his mental ability. You can also take guidance from some proper counselor.

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