Here are some tips for parents to handle pressure:

• Learning to handle stress
  
  
• Here are some signs to watch for and actions to take
  
  
• Recognize signs of stress
  
  
• Common signs include headaches, tight neck, racing heartbeat, anxiety, anger, stomach problems, and difficulty concentrating.
  
  
• Avoid stress when possible
  
  
• If you can avoid situations that cause you stress, do so. Also, be alert for times of day when tensions run high, such as mealtime or bedtime.
  
  
• Don’t lose your cool
  
  
• Take a few moments to cool down, rather than blow up.
  
  
• Get organized
  
  
• Make a list of what you need to do each day and set priorities. Be realistic. Cross off things that can wait. Leave time in your day for unexpected events.
  
  
• Get all the help you can
  
  
• Share chores.Give your children some responsibilities, such as helping with dinner or feeding the family pet. Ask family and friends for help.
  
  
• Set up a network with other parents. Take turns watching each other’s children or driving children to after-school events. Talk with each other about challenges (and successes); this is a good way to relieve frustration.
  
  
• Take care of yourself

A healthy person can handle the stress better so eat right, get enough sleep, schedule time for yourself to do something you enjoy and to relax.

Any major change in a child’s life can cause stress. Common sources of stress are the birth of a new sibling or the divorce of parents. Stress also can be caused by the death of a relative or a beloved pet, a family move, separation from parents for extended periods, pressure to succeed, overly strict discipline, and natural disasters (even when the child has only seen them on television).

Not all stress can, or should, be avoided. Young children do not view the world as adults do. Misunderstandings or feelings of confusion can build up and leave children with stress they cannot handle alone. Young children cannot easily verbalize these feelings, so we adults must be aware of physical or behavioral changes: loss of appetite, sleep troubles, nightmares, headaches, stomachaches, or regressive behaviors such as thumb sucking.

Adults play an important role in helping children cope with stress by providing a supportive atmosphere in which to talk about or play out concerns. We need to acknowledge and accept the feelings children express and give them our support, at home and at school. An attitude of love, understanding, and acceptance helps children get through difficult times.

Unfortunately, that worry is front and center for some adult children. Their parents may be living paycheck to paycheck, or it may be that they simply failed to plan well for retirement. Either way, the kids recognize the warning sign and the message is clear: “Financial crisis ahead.” They wonder how they will handle the burden if their parents run low on money.

If you are among them, there are steps you can take now to mitigate future financial troubles.

Talking to your parents is a good first move. Without question, the best time to talk about money with your parents is when they are healthy and independent. However, don’t expect an easy ride if your parents’ motto has always been, “We’re fine. Don’t worry.”

“If you’ve got parents who’ve always had control and never relied on their kids, that’s tough,” said certified financial planner Joan Gruber of Dallas. Gruber, who specializes in elder care issues, had a relative who never wanted to discuss the financial aspects of being incapacitated. She finally yielded when her health failed. Even then, she waited until she was being wheeled into surgery to sign over power of attorney to her children.

That is far from ideal. The longer you wait, the fewer choices you will have and the greater the potential for costly administrative hassles and emotional stress.

If your parents brush you off as alarmist, try this argument: Should anything happen to them, the burden of managing their health care and their finances will likely fall to you and your siblings. Since you want to follow their wishes and make them as comfortable as possible, it would be a gift to you if they minimized your burden by being open about their situation now.

Make sure basics are in order
At the very least, encourage your parents to create or update their estate planning documents. These documents include a will, a living will, and power of attorney authorizing another person to handle their business affairs if they are incapacitated, and a health-care proxy naming someone to make health-care decisions for them should they become unable to do so.